Ok... I will be going on a cruise to nowhere again in another six hours.

I always hate having to be away for extended periods. The thought of having to return to the normalcy of socialisation irks me. I have been so caught up in my work that I have no time to take stock of life; and I am losing grip of my sanity. It came to a point where I am not too sure why am I working so hard, or even working anymore. Work has lost its meaning.

It seems strange how with the progression of technology and society, we lose time. The increased in efficiency seems to demand beyond human capacity. Some say the mind is limitless, I think we are limited by the hours of the days. The entire setup made me rather edgy this few days. We have come a full circle from the days of slavery to where we started; only the whip is the next pay cheque.

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On a separate note, I have been having more difficulties understanding myself lately. I am caught in the barrage of confusion. I could not even be sure of who I fundamentally am. What dictates me? Who am I? Why am I here?

A friend told me that I am too young to enter into mid-life crisis. Perhaps it has to do with the recent trouble that I had faced. It wedges painfully a point that I don't know what I want, who I want.

I seek enlightenment of sorts. But I know not where to look.