It is coming towards the close of the year.

Just a year ago, I was distraught by the fact that I was seemingly heading nowhere. I made the resolution at that point in time that I should start devoting time and energy in seeking out the meaning for my life.

A year has passed. And I am equally distraught by the fact that I am still heading nowhere. I don't seem to be scoring in any aspect of life. Worst yet, I am losing steam in professional aspect. I am dreading the prospect work. Every other day I will be dragging myself to the car, and not finding a meaning why. I have made big plans of transition. Colleagues were commenting the courage it takes to leave a well-paying job into the depths of darkness beyond. But I would rather give up the life of comfort to venture into the darkness. The darkness holds more charm than the unnerving glare that I have to face everyday.

Gripes are not getting me any further. I realised with angst that I only have another year to figure out what I want to do after. The candle that will light up my life: the candle of hope.